To some people, this may seem like a weird thing to do…memorialize yourself. But to those who think this is weird, how else can one pay homage to a version of yourself that has died?
To be honest with you, I thought about just writing this in my journal and burning the paper but that felt dishonorable. You see, I’m not ashamed of the person I used to be. In fact, I’m proud of the person that I used to be because it has made me who I am today.
I decided to go public with this letter because I want others to know that it is possible to experience HELL and come back stronger BECAUSE of your experiences and not IN SPITE of your experiences.
Life conspires to support us in all of our endeavors. Nothing just happens but, sometimes, in the moment, it feels cold, hard, and heartless. I promise you, that if you just keep going, there will be a huge payoff. And that payoff is FREEDOM and PEACE.
I would love for you to take a minute or two to read the letter I wrote in honor of the old version of myself. Make sure you read until the end because there is a special invitation for you.
“Dearest Andréa,
This is an open letter to memorialize who you were and all of the good that you brought into this world. Before leaving Wisconsin for Sedona, Arizona, you set the intention of dying and I am writing this letter to let you know that you have achieved that goal. Your intention has been satisfied.
Old version of Andréa, I first want to take this time to offer up gratitude for you. You were a fighter, protector, warrior, encourager, motivator and you were also burdened, sad, angry, and critical. I’m grateful for all of these traits because they are what birthed this version Andréa.
The things that you have experienced in your lifetime have been traumatic, devastating, and heart-breaking. You experienced the death of your brother at 4 years old, the separation of your parents at 5 years old and moving to a new state where you didn’t know anyone.
From the ages of about 6-8, you witnessed extreme domestic abuse from your mother’s boyfriend towards her. Around that same time, you were sexually molested by a family member and you kept that secret for nearly 20 years. You moved to 10 different addresses over the period of 10 years…never being able to call any of those places “home.” Everywhere you lived was considered the “ghetto” or “hood.”
Within those 10 years, you’ve lived in shelters, ate at soup kitchens, lost family, friends and classmates due to gun violence, experienced bullying, and everything in between.
BUT even through all of that, you KNEW that life was so much more than what you were experiencing. You KNEW that there was something special about YOU. You had surmised that you would rise above the chaos that was your life. And because of this, you did well in school, didn’t involve yourself with the boys who thought you were cute, or engage in other “risky” behaviors (other than the occasional blunt or joint).
When your mother moved you from the inner city to the suburbs, while in high school, you were treated poorly. You experienced racism at the hands of the students, your teachers, counselors, and administrators. This was a very low point in your life. You wanted to give up, BUT you didn’t. You weathered the storm because you KNEW that there was so much more to life than what you were experiencing.
At the age of 19, you asked yourself, “who am I?” That was the beginning of the end for you. From the time you asked that question until the day of your “death” on November 13, 2020, you set out on the journey of self-discovery to answer that question.
On April 21, 2000, you gave your life to Christ and became born again. On that day, you heard a voice that said, “I am the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, the God of Jacob, and I am the God over you.” There are no words to describe how you felt that day. Even this many years later, it is still an indescribable experience.
There have been many, many highs with equal amounts of lows! You fought to get your associate’s degree in accounting and continued on to get your bachelor’s degree in accounting and business administration. You knew the odds of being a successful accountant, in Wisconsin, were stacked against you but you preserved.
While climbing the corporate ladder, you experience more racism from your colleagues and managers but you didn’t let that stop you. You kept climbing, gaining the necessary skills to get to the top. There were days when you wanted to give up. But you remembered that there was so much more to life than what you were experiencing.
You were married shortly after you completed your bachelor’s degree and got pregnant with your daughter after being married for only 3 months. You went back to school for your MBA when your daughter was just 5 weeks old. People told you that you were crazy but you KNEW that there was so much more to life than what you were experiencing.
A little over a year into grad school, you got pregnant with your son. You gave birth to him on a Thursday and 10 days later, you were back in class. Again, people thought you were crazy but you didn’t let that stop you.
You have bought a house, sold a house, built a house, traveled throughout the US including Hawaii, the Caribbean, Canada, and Mexico, owned one of your dream cars, met amazing people, maintained a happy and successful marriage and healthy relationships with your children.
You’ve also worked hard and had a successful corporate career in accounting and finance and retired from that successful corporate career, launched a business, podcast, course, and now powerful Mentorship.
You’ve invested hundreds of thousands of dollars in coaches, courses, programs, etc. to improve yourself and your business. In fact, it was a $27K investment in a coach and mentor, and now friend, that led you to your retreat in Sedona.
You were tired and you felt that you had accomplished ALL that you needed to accomplish. Your role was to break the generational curses that were passed down through your DNA from your enslaved African ancestors AND Native American ancestors. You have broken the curses of poverty, sexual perversion, addictive personalities, disease, and divorce. And that led you to set the intention of dying before leaving for Sedona, AZ.
Again, thank you for fighting the good fight. Because of your strength, I am able to show up in this world authentically empowered, knowing exactly who I am. I make no apologies for my confidence, my power, and my strength. I am who I am because you have done the hard work of healing ALL that was broken.
The way for me to honor you the most is to live my life according to the one that you KNEW existed outside of all of your experiences. I make this promise to you today, December 1, 2020, that I will live the abundant life that you KNEW existed.
I will use my experiences to help those who are seeking healing so that they can show up authentically empowered. I will NOT apologize for being who I am because you paid the ultimate price for me.
Thank you for showing me who I am and what I am capable of.
In Your Honor,
Andréa”
If anything that you’ve read resonates with you, then I’m inviting you to learn more about my powerful 6-month Master Your Inner World Mentorship by watching the on-demand/Netflix style masterclass.
During the masterclass, you learn:
- 3 of the biggest mistakes most people make when trying to master their inner world
- 4 things that you can do right now to take back control of your life
- how to experience lasting and permanent change
Click on the image below to get registered!
